


Not This Time

by CrossoverSPN



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Canon Compliant, Coda, Fix-It, Fluff, I don't really know what to tag this, M/M, Post season/series 12 finale, Shared Heavens, Soulmates, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-19
Updated: 2017-05-19
Packaged: 2018-11-02 10:44:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10942884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrossoverSPN/pseuds/CrossoverSPN
Summary: Dean waited for Chuck to bring Cas back to life, but when nothing happened, he decided to go after him the only way he knows how.





	Not This Time

**Author's Note:**

> I don't usually write for canon-verse, but fuck that finale. Seriously.

Dean looked up to the sky waiting, praying for Chuck to do something, anything. But the sky was quiet and still and Cas still wasn’t moving. He was afraid to look down, but the longer he stared at the sky the more hopeless he felt. His eyes lingered down and when they landed on Cas, his knees gave out. His mind was rushing a thousand miles a minute, trying to think about how they could cheat death this time.

“Cas…” He finally breathed out, his voice cracking. He couldn’t look down at hole in his shirt where the blade had gone through, he kept his eyes on Cas’ face, running through every plan possible. Then it hit him, the solution was so simple. He let his hand go to Cas’ shoulder, “Chuck said he kept rebuilding you for me and Sam…but we both know that’s bullshit,” he whispered, trying to force even half of his mouth to turn up into a grin, “He remade you for me…we have a profound bond right?” Dean slowly let his other hand go to his waist, “Which means, if I’m right about this…you’ll be waiting for me…then all we have to do is get out of that place together. I know what you’re thinking, but listen, angel or not, if you really are…made for me…you’ll be there. This is gonna work. It has to. Then, you, me, and Sam, can figure out a way to get mom…and everything is gonna be ok.” Dean felt a tear slip down his cheek and he was trembling as he pulled his gun to his temple.

“I’ll see you soon, Cas.” 

Sam was frozen, looking at Jack, when he heard the sound. Sam and Jack both flinched and Sam felt his heart sink.

It took a while, but Dean got through all of his “greatest hits.” There were a lot of new ones this time around, it probably helped that he got through all of them this time. For a moment, he had forgotten about everything that had happened in those last few days. It was like everyone and everything was just as it should be. Then, at the end of the road, he found the bunker door. Home. A few years ago, it might have looked like his childhood home, all white and surrounded in beautiful green…but not now. This was his happy ending. 

Dean took a deep breath and lifted his hand to the door. “Please be here….” Dean whispered to himself or to Chuck or to whoever arranged this stuff, and he opened the door. Everything was dark and quiet, the kind of unnatural quiet that doesn’t really exist normally, the kind that you can’t hear any nature or any quiet creaking in the pipes or walls, no humming of computers, or voices down the halls, just an unnerving stillness. Dean’s mouth fell slightly, all the warmth he had felt before seemed to grow ice cold. 

“Cas?” Dean called out, too afraid to shout and not get a response. He hit the lights and headed down the stairs, looking for any sign that he hadn’t made a horrible mistake. “Cas?” He called again, looking around corners of hallways as he moved through the labyrinth of rooms. Nothing in the war room, nothing in his room or Cas’ room, then he saw it. A ray of light beaming from the kitchen. Dean moved slowly at first then rushed over, grabbing the door knob and throwing it open.  
There, sitting at the table, with a book in his hand, was Cas, looking up stunned. “Dean?”  
Dean looked at Cas in awe for a moment before smiling wide, “I knew it, I fucking knew it.” He walked in and Cas stood up, putting his book on the table.

“How are you here?” Cas asked, his eyes looking over Dean in the way they used to, back when Cas had no idea what to make of him, back when he was all angel of the lord. 

Dean couldn’t help but give a quiet chuckle as he moved his hand up, he wanted to move it to Cas’ cheek, but he couldn’t, so it went to Cas’ shoulder. He gripped it and shook him a bit, “I came after you, dumbass. I couldn’t just let you leave before we figured everything out after all,” he tried to sound serious, but he couldn’t, not when he knew the truth. 

“Dean…my heaven…the heaven for angels is on a completely different plane from the heaven for humans…how did you…”

Dean grinned like he was in on the biggest joke in the world, “Cas, buddy, this is my heaven too.” 

Cas’s brows furrowed as he thought about the implications of that sentence, then it hit him, and he looked at Dean in reverence, “You mean…”

“Yeah, we’re soulmates. That’s why Chuck kept giving you back to me. Guess he realized that wasn’t enough for me to get my head outta my ass.” Cas looked at him, trying to understand again and Dean shook his head, he had never been any good at this. 

“I mean to say, that, I love you too. I shoulda said it earlier, but every time I try to get a minute to just talk to you, you’re always running off somewhere on some new mission and I get so worried about you and pissed, frankly, it’s like you never want to just stay…”

Cas looked away, “I wasn’t leaving because of you…I was trying to make things better, to make up for all the mistakes I’ve made…to prove to myself and to you that I am…not worthless.” 

“Cas, I never-“

Cas shook Dean off, “I know, that doesn’t mean it didn’t feel like it.” Dean looked at him, wanting to grab him again, but knowing better. 

“Cas...I’m not asking you to just stay with us all the time, or stay at the bunker watching Netflix or whatever, you can have your own life and do what you need to do…I just…want you to come home at the end of it…stop and rest your wings or whatever. Maybe tell me what you’re doing and let me help. Stop throwing yourself around like you don’t matter…”

“Dean, your idea of helping is usually just you telling me to let you handle it or for you to ignore the problem.” It stung, but Dean knew Cas was right. 

“I’ll do better. Hell, I have been doing better, you can ask Sam, I get that you two are capable, in fact there is no one in the world I trust more than you and Sam to get a job done or have my back, I just worry. I know that won’t change, but I am doing better at this whole overbearing thing and I promise, if I’m not, you can just tell me. I just want us to be a family, Cas. I want you to count on me like I count on you…I want you to know what the hell you do to me when you kamikaze into whatever danger is out there.” Dean reached out again, this time taking Cas’s wrist. 

“Dean…I don’t deserve-“

“Hold up, don’t even start down that path, trust me, I know it like the back of my hand. We’ve both messed up more than once, but we do a hell of a lot of good too and you know what?”

“What?”

“Clearly, Chuck thinks we deserve each other. That has to count for something, right?”

Cas gave a small smile at that, and that alone spread that warmth right back through every bone in Dean’s body. “I suppose, the fact that you are here, and the fact that I am here…does mean that we are...tied together…”

“And doomed to inevitably make horrible decisions together…but we’ll do good too, Cas. We always do.” Dean slowly let his grip loosen until his hand slide down to Cas’. Cas’ eyes flickered down to their hands and with a careful, nervous grace, he entwined their fingers together. 

“Should we…find our way out then?” Cas asked quietly. 

Dean nodded, “Yeah, I may or may not have left Sam with a hell of a mess to clean up…” 

Cas looked up at him, “Then…we had better get some weapons. I doubt they will let us leave peacefully.”

Dean grinned, “Now we’re talking, let’s go.” He headed out of the kitchen, pulling Castiel behind him. Cas was caught off guard at first and stumbled behind him, but quickly moved in step with him, slowly, letting his hand close tighter with Dean’s.


End file.
